The Truth About Lies

Lies are easy.

That's the truth. Lies are so much easier to get out of our mouths sometimes than the truth is. And the truth? Well, that's harder. The world has no interest in truth. It may ask for it, but it has no desire to actually hear it. And heaven for bid the truth be volunteered.

Why is that, do you think? My conclusion? Truth is inconvenient. Really inconvenient.

"Do these jeans make my butt look big?" Anyone, male or female, can tell you that, regardless of the truth, the more convenient answer is a resounding "NO!"

Truth is inconvenient and truth can be hard to adequately communicate. Tonight I was involved in a debate with a stranger on a friend's Facebook post regarding the harmfulness of pornography. In discussing the debate with my friend I expressed that I have a hard time just walking away when I know the truth. He stated that the truth is sometimes hard to present over the internet. The truth is always harder it seems. During the debate I stated, rather innocuously I thought, that porn causes all manner of harm, be it to the man it enslaves, to the heartbroken wife who is left wondering what she should have done or what's wrong with her that she isn't enough for him, to the daughter who watches her mother change herself in every way she can think of to be more appealing to her husband so he won't need that any more, or to the son who watches his father keep his mother at arm's length and push her aside and learns that this is how he should relate to women in his life. These things barely scratch the surface. They are the "tamer" consequences. While, by the grace of God, I have not experienced this first hand, I have witnessed the pain porn can cause. The stranger, however, didn't agree. I apparently was blowing everything out of proportion. I was labeling every man who ever looked at porn a "home-wrecking bastard" and the negative situation I may have witnessed was the exception, not the rule. That's certainly not true. But I understand why the truth would be hard to swallow.

In a society that thrives, at least short term, on instant gratification, this truth is terribly inconvenient. To accept that the consumption of porn causes sexual, emotional, relational, and spiritual brokenness means either participating anyway and dealing with guilt or choosing not to engage it and forgo temporary pleasure which our society has mistakenly labelled "happiness."

Even knowing THE Truth doesn't necessarily stop the flesh from rejecting truth. A number of years ago, my friend, Leslie, and I discussed how lies, though we may know with our minds that they are lies, are much easier for our hearts to accept sometimes. Why? Well, as our conversations so often do, it ended with a shrug and an, "I just don't know." Well, I have since, in part, figured it out.

I'm going to be honest. Behind this bubbly exterior and big brown eyes lies something of a control freak. I know, those of you who know me are scraping your jaws off the floor as we speak (sorry, guys, for whatever reason "sarcasm" isn't a font option on Blogger). That being said, combine that with my sin nature and I am a breathtaking example of arrogance, stubbornness, and self-centeredness. While I might adjust my halo and claim to want to find God's will, what I actually want is to find God's will to be in accordance with mine. Anybody out there feel me? Maybe? And as it is my will I am desiring, naturally I would desire my happiness, my safety, my security, and my well-being.

So what does that have to do with lies?

I have never made much of a secret of the fact that I have struggled with my singleness and desire to be married and have a family. The lies Satan has the easiest time selling me on is that there is something wrong with me. I am not good enough, pretty enough, deserving enough, nor lovable enough to be in a relationship and nobody could ever want me. Now why is that so much easier to accept than the truth that I am created in the image of God and have been given sonship through the sacrifice and atoning work of Christ so that my worth and value are found in that? That's certainly a more positive thing to believe. Why is the lie easier?

Well, I have figured it out. If I believe that God is sovereign, then to believe the truth, to believe that I am not single due to not being beautiful enough, good enough, worthy enough or lovable enough, to believe that my value and worth are in Christ means that I am single because God willed me to be that way. Whether I am single for this season or for the rest of my life, it will not be because I am not good enough or I did something wrong, it will be because God is sovereign. As long as I believed the lies, it was about me. As long as I believed that, then I was in "control" of the situation, if only through my faults. That, dear ones, is exactly why I have found the lies so much easier to believe. The believe the truth is inconvenient for me because it means this is an intentional part of God's plan. I'm not going to lie, when I first realized this, it sort of felt like a betrayal. Of course it isn't and even if it isn't what I think I want, I have to believe God's plan for me is better. He promises it is. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." What a joyful thing to believe in place of the lies.

Another lie I have never had trouble accepting is that I can't do something. I am not good enough. I can't do enough to make a difference. I can't really help. I will fail. As with the best lies, there is an element of truth. I can't do anything, make a difference, or succeed alone. But I'm not alone, am I? These lies are so terribly convenient because they give me an ever so simple, neat, and tidy excuse to retreat, hide away in my comfort zone, give up, and never risk. Believing these lies makes it about me again. It makes my life about my comfort and safety. But life is risk. God does not call us to a safe life, a tame life, a life of safety and security. Nor does He call us to face any of it alone. Isaiah 59:19 says, "When the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the LORD will raise up a standard against him."  Deuteronomy 20 says, "For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory." Why would I want it to do it alone?

So here's how I see it. Lies might be easier, they might let me cling to some semblance of control, they may keep life from being so much of a risk, they might make it easier to live the way you want, but they enslave you. And the truth? Well, truth is harder, but it is better. What lies do you find easier? Which truths are you rejecting?