Confessions of a Reformed Anti-Valentine... or... Why I No Longer Hate Valentine's Day

Well, here we are again, Valentine's Day. This day has earned itself multiple aliases over the years: V-Day, Hearts Day, Singles Awareness Day, or, as my dear friend Dan dubbed it, "Women are Cruel Evil Succubi Day." Don't worry, he was just joking. I think. Anyway, yes, as a single person, Valentine's Day can be somewhat less than fun. Even if you don't really care all that much about it, you're still being constantly reminded that you are single. And like many single people, I had come to resent it (confession 1, though it really shouldn't come as all that big a shock). For pretty much a month beforehand, we are bombarded by ads, big balloons, massive teddy bears (confession 2: I always look at those and think, "what in the world would a grown woman need or do with that thing?" Then I think I would like to have one.), boxes of chocolate so large that they could single-handedly send you into a diabetic coma even if you aren't diabetic, and every shade of red and pink imaginable. And if you're a Hallmark employee, trust me, it's even worse. It is rather easy, at this point and in that frame of heart and mind, for Satan to worm his way in with his well-aimed, well-timed arrows. Unfortunately, unlike Cupid's arrows which are tipped in love, Satan's are doused in poisonous lies. You know, just because you're single, it doesn't mean you are alone. Just because you're single, it doesn't mean you are unloved. Confession 3: more often than not, I forget that.

But of course we're surrounded by all those things. Valentine's Day is, after all, a celebration of love! Now, yes, most people use it as a celebration of romantic love. Given the legendary history of Valentine's Day they are correct to do so. One legend says that when Emperor Claudius II ruled, he decided men could no longer marry because unmarried men were better soldiers. Valentine refused to abide by this law and continued to perform marriage ceremonies in secret. When he was discovered, Claudius had him executed. But while most view it as a romantic holiday, Valentine's Day is a celebration of love and there are all kinds of love, as I was reminded of today.

There is the kind of love that is found in a great big Papa Bear hug before leaving for work. There is the kind of love that causes a terrific teaching assistant, who already gives so much of herself in loving and serving me and our preschoolers, to bring me English Breakfast K-Cups so I would have something to use in our classroom Keurig and because she knows I love tea and often need an afternoon pick-me-up that is caffeinated in nature. There is the kind of love that is shown in the excited eyes and voice of a little 4 year old boy who comes running up after all his valentine cards have been delivered clutching one last love note in his sweet little hand. There is the kind of love shown by a parent who sent me tea from Kenya (noticing a theme? I love tea!) and a note thanking me for how much and how well I love their son. There is the kind of love felt in a little girl hugging me so hard I swear I heard and felt a rib crack. There is the kind of love that comes via a text from my younger brother to say "I love you!" There is the kind of love that causes two of my favorite little buddies' eyes to light up and to shriek, "Miss Carrie!!! Miss Carrie is here!!!" when they answer the door to find me standing on their porch. There is the kind of love that is found by two dear friends enjoying an unseasonably lovely afternoon at the park sharing about the joys and struggles of life and encouraging and entertaining each other. There is the kind of love felt in sharing dinner with wonderful parents. There is the kind of love found in two friends laughing hysterically together over a movie about the effect of love on zombies (I'll tell you something, I really enjoyed Warm Bodies). Oh, and there's the kind of love that affects zombies!

But even more than all those amazing, wonderful kinds of loves, there is the unchangeable, unfathomable, inseparable love of our Heavenly Father which is demonstrated over and over again in more ways than we can imagine or comprehend. It is displayed in each breath we are permitted to take and in each of the previously mentioned loves. It is displayed in our salvation and in the fruits we bear as a result.

So yes, I don't necessarily fit in at society's Valentine's Day party. Yes, I'm actually still waiting for my date to come pick me up for that party, but that's okay. See, here's the thing I realized: I'm blessed. I didn't just only get to have a romantic evening with my significant other. I experienced an entire day of being surrounded by people I love and who love me. I was loved on and blessed by those people (though really, many of them do that every day). I got to love and bless them in return. So who, really, after all that, could look at Valentine's Day and hate it?

Ireland Bound

I am very excited to share that I have received the official invitation from the team in Kilkenny, Ireland to join them for a month this summer. While there, I will be assisting church members with their annual vacation Bible school and annual soccer sports outreach ministry. I will also help with children's and youth ministry as well as community outreach and evangelism projects. The current plan is to be there mid-late June to mid-late July. I am very excited by this opportunity to serve the church and Body of Christ there in Kilkenny and am looking forward to spending time serving in children’s and youth ministries there especially.

I am in a unique and awesome situation in that I already have my support raised so I can focus on spiritual preparation, learning about the country I will be serving in, and connecting with the others who will be serving through this internship as well. I would appreciate continued prayers as I continue to prepare for this service opportunity. Some specific ways you can be praying for me are:

-          That  I would continue to grow closer and stronger in the Lord as I continue serving by teaching my preschoolers here and as I prepare to serve Him in Ireland this summer.

-          That there would be a strong sense of team unity and common purpose with my co-interns.

-          That God would remove shyness and give me boldness for the community outreach and evangelism aspects of this, which are not necessarily areas I feel comfortable or gifted in. I am much more comfortable and gifted in working with kids and youth, loving on them, and sharing with them.

-          For good health and safe travel while I’m there.

-          I will be getting an international driver’s license and be responsible for driving my co-interns around while we’re there and that makes me exceedingly nervous. Please pray that I will adjust QUICKLY to the different traffic patterns and laws, driving on the wrong side of the road, on the wrong side of the car, and to an unknown city!

Still Be My Vision

When I started thinking about what to call this blog, I was thinking about the purpose of this blog. I wanted a place to be able to write about my time in Ireland this summer and the time leading up to it, but also to use once I'm back to write about what the Lord is teaching me and how He's leading me. During my musings, I started humming "Be Thou My Vision," a beautiful old hymn that, interestingly enough, is Irish in origin. The words are such a beautiful prayer and so much what I want my prayer to be at all times. One of my absolute favorite versions of this song is by Michael Card and is on his Starkindler album.

Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me save that Thou art
Thou my best thought by day or by night
Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light

Be Thou my wisdom, and Thou my true word
I ever with Thee and Thou with me Lord
Thou my Great Father, I Thy true son
Thou with me dwelling and I with Thee one

Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise
Thou mine inheritance, now and always
Thou and Thou only first in my heart
High King of Heaven, my treasure Thou art

High King of Heaven, my victory won
May I reach Heaven's joys, O bright Heaven's sun
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall
Still be my vision, oh Ruler of all